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Tape Worms and The End of the World

Tape Worms and The End of the World By Jonathan Aluzas I might have to kill myself.? Yep, just might have to.? But not because I'm not happy with life, or depressed or because I…

How Do You Define “Anti-Aging?”

How Do You Define "Anti-Aging?"
Written by Jonathan Aluzas
Does this seem normal?
Does this seem normal?
Can someone tell me what anti-aging is, really?? I'm crystal clear on the general concept, but if you search the term online you'll come up with a vast spectrum of philosophies, diets, products, practitioners and snake-oil peddlers who loiter in the anteroom of the "anti-aging" industry.? It's no wonder, the pursuit of everlasting youthfulness has been undertaken by everyone from the ancient Egyptians to alchemists to Ponce de Leon to modern chemists and physicians and finally by the general public.? And in our desperation for eternal vigor we've tried just about everything; natural spas, pills, injections, religions, monkey testicles.? No, you didn't misread that, I said monkey testicles.? Apparently one ancient approach was the ingestion of monkey balls.? The sad thing is, if a news flash came across TMZ that Madonna's secret to staying young was monkey balls, women all over L.A. would be knocking them back like Skittles.? That's how sick we are for youth.? But what exactly is "anti-aging?"There is no definition for the term "anti-aging" on Dictionary.com, so clearly it's a concept subject to interpretation. (more…)

25 Random but Useful Fitness Thoughts

Written by Jonathan Aluzas25 Random but Useful Fitness Thoughts1.? Richard Simmons:? Dolphin shorts, Afro, chubby belly, squeaky voice, constant weeping, millions of dollars in the bank and legions of devoted followers.? Fitness doesn't have to look cool in order to matter.? He knows his market and serves his market, and for that I think he's cool.2.? "Fitness" is the physical efficiency with which you are able to live life, not the degree of hotness with which you are able to rock a tank top.? Nothing wrong with looking good, but let's not confuse fitness with aesthetics.? I've seen guys who are jacked and shredded who can't climb a flight of stairs without having to take a knee.? That's what I call "useless muscle;" all show, no go.3.? I think it's great that celebrities can come back from giving birth and have a smoking hot body in a matter of months, but I'm more impressed with the housewife in Des Moines who does the same thing with a lot less money and no full-time staff. (more…)

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